A line I once heard in movie kinda stuck with me:
“having a baby is like having a tattoo on your face”
At the time it sounded too cynical to me. After having a baby, I realized its true, its very true. BUT. It’s a really cute tattoo, one that redefined love for you. It opened a world of emotions to you (some I confess through hormones) and every time you look at this tattoo it fills you with a primal instinct: to love unconditionally, to protect, to guide and again, to love unconditionally. You just cant live without this tattoo and you don’t regret getting this tattoo even for the teeniest fraction of a second. Yes its inconvenient to have it on your face. But that’s the only not-so-awesome part of this tattoo deal.
Yeah yeah all the cliches are true. Yes, there isn’t any time to do ANYTHING. Even when you drop the little one at mums and head off for errands or a date, every second is defined by What The Baby Is Doing. Is he napping? Is he missing me? Will this temporary separation scar him for life? Is this errand important enough for me to be away from my baby? I think I’m a bad mother.
Hence, ‘me time’ is redefined forever. Your time is never yours. Forget husband, family, friends. It will never be the same again. It may sound dismal but its not all that bad most days. This is what I bargained for. This was a deal and I signed my end of it with all my heart, presence of mind, absolute willingness and enthusiasm. Lets shake hands and what the heck lets spit on it too. No hard feelings. No regrets.
But what about this? This extramarital affair with writing? This secret passion? Where does this fit in? Surely not something I can bury. This MUST be pursued, because its not a choice. Hence the title of this blog- While Baby Naps. That’s when we mommies remember we were people before we became moms, that’s when we do what defines us besides motherhood, that’s when we come face to face with possibilities, that’s when we proverbially ‘get a life’. And while tapping away at our PC we pray to the heavens above that the little one naps just a little bit more.